You Are Wrong

day and night yin yang

You are stuck in a metaphor. You have an idea in your head about what the world is. As the unfortunate bearer of bad news, I have come to inform you, you are wrong!

 

Whatever you think the world is, it is not. Whatever you think your life is, it is not. Whatever you think of the people around you and your interactions with them, they are false. They are a false perception generated by a mind that believes it understands, it does not. You are laboring under a false paradigm. The sooner you accept this, the easier this will be.

 

You came to this world with the best intentions, seeking experience and wisdom. You came seeking to understand and develop emotionally. But what you have gained, instead of wisdom is baggage. Instead of emotional growth you have bias. Instead of perspective you have become myopic. Your world view taints everything around you and disconnects you from the truth.

 

You are empowered by a metaphor. You have a model in your head of what the world is. As the fortunate bearer of good news, I have come to inform you, you are right!

 

Whatever you think the world is, you are right. Whatever you think your life is, it is. Whatever you think of the people around you and of your interactions with them, they are true. They are a true perception generated by a mind that understands with crystal clarity. You are laboring under a true paradigm. The sooner you accept this, the easier it will be.

 

You came into this world with the best intentions, seeking experience and wisdom. You came seeking to understand and develop emotionally. What you have gained is wisdom. You have attained emotional growth beyond your wildest imaginings. You have attained perspective and clarity of vision. Your world view paints everything around you, connecting you with the truth.

 

Namaste,

 

Kevin

day and night yin yang

Time to Step Up

plan success

We have grown up in a culture of nurturing. It hasn’t always been a healthy nurturing, but there is always someone around telling you how you should respond to a situation, what we should care about, what something means… The problem is, they are not always right. And you are old enough now to step up and take ownership. I’m talking to you weather you are 16 or 60. With quite a margin of error on both sides of that. Let’s say plus or minus 20 years.

 

You’ve reached an age of reason. A place of responsibility. Stop looking to the outside for ideas about what to do and how to do it. Stop looking for people to tell you what is right and wrong. You know! Stop asking which way to look and what you’re supposed to see.

 

Step up and do what your heart tells you.

 

If you can’t hear your heart, then you’ve got one more task as you step up, learn how to listen to your heart.

 

Your heart has one rule. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. That’s it.

 

Listen to your heart. It’s not hard. And it’s not easy. If you have been ignoring your heart for a while the dissonance between what your heart says and the way you are living can be quite alarming.

 

Why should you listen to me? Why should you take my advice to stop taking advice?

 

The short answer is, you shouldn’t.

 

Your heart has a natural rhythm to it, an energetic frequency if you will, and when you come in contact with like minded ideas it resonates. Like two sine waves adding together the amplitude increases.

 

A quick math lesson.

Hear is a graph of the rhythm of your heart, a normal sine wave with amplitude (height of the wave) and frequency (the time it takes to complete one cycle up and down).

sine-wave-heart

And here is a graph of the rhythm of an idea, that has the same frequency.

sine-wave

So the result, since the two rhythms are of the same frequency, they add to each other. Like this:

The green line is the result of the two waves adding together.

sinewave-result

So to have an idea that resonates with your heart is to say that they are alike and the result is additive. Likewise an idea that is incompatible with your heart would result in a decreasing amplitude. AKA You wouldn’t feel it.

 

Learn to listen to your heart, and after that, let this be the last time you let someone tell you what to do.

 

Let me be clear.

I’m not telling you to stop listening to others. I’m telling you that you have a filter built in that can let you know whether to listen to others.

I’m not talking about quitting your job, though your job may need to change.

I’m not telling you to stopping doing what your boss at work tells you, though you may need to gently push back.

What I am telling you is to take charge of your life. Step up and own your experience.

 

We can get in a pattern of gathering input and cramming for the big test, that will come eventually… What I’m telling you is that you’re taking the test now. Your moment has come. Your train is boarding. Your moment to shine is now! We are here for only a brief time and if you can’t be true to yourself, if you let someone else tell you who you are and what you’re doing here, then what was the point? They have their life, let them live it on their terms and you live your life on your terms.

 

I’m describing this as a single action. But our lives are so complex that it’s more of a cascading action. Instead of one single amazing occurrence this is a series of actions that can slowly reclaim each aspect of your life until you suddenly realize that you are you now. But it begins with a single step, listen to your heart.

 

Namaste,

 

Kevin

 

Success Plan

Fear Is the Mind Killer

Fear Of Crisis With Businessman Like An Ostrich

“I must not fear, fear is the mind killer.” – Paul Atreides – Frank Herbert’s Dune

Fear is powerful. Fear is primal. Fear is the mind killer.

 

There is much to be learned from science fiction. It allows us to remove the layers of a normal emotional response to stimulus and to seek the deeper lessons of story and legend. In this case we are listening to the mental mantra of Paul Atreides, son of the duke. He is talking himself into persevering a difficult trial. If he passes he surprise everyone and if he fails he will die. The stakes are incredibly high, and the primary risk of failure is simply fear.

 

The test he is undergoing is to see if he is human or an animal, which part of him will win out? For the test he has been told to place his hand in a box.

In the box is pain.

If he removes his hand he will be poisoned and die.

If he keeps his hand in the box he will suffer intense pain.

It is a struggle between the two brains of a human being, the mind (our logic and order) and the animal brain (our instinct and reaction).

 

It’s pure and simple metaphor in a test that excites the mind and drives the imagination. What will our hero do? Will he survive?

 

His mantra has always stuck with me over the years. I must not fear, fear is the mind killer. Such powerful language. But to be honest, I didn’t fully understand it. I may still not, but I have a new insight into it. Paul was concerned with giving over his will to his animal brain and becoming nothing more than an animal. Falling to instinct and reaction and losing his ability to use logic and reason. Losing his mind, or in sharper language, killing his mind.

 

We live in an age of fear. It seems like everyone is trying to push us into a fear reaction. Driving us to respond as animals. Trying to force us to release our freedom of being human.

 

I have had a lot of fear this week. From a server outage to the constant pressure of upcoming deadlines and new projects. It’s been a fear inducing week.

 

I needed this moment to pause and realize, I don’t have to react like an animal. I can forego the fear and focus on the knowledge that I am going to be okay. I have survived the past odds are I will survive the future, or in this case, I will survive the present.

 

Namaste,

Kevin

 

Fear Of Crisis With Businessman Like An Ostrich

Imagine Your Life In A Graphic Novel

woman peeking out vector drawing, stripped pattern red backgrou

What would your life look like as a comic book? Oops, sorry, I mean graphic novel. How would the first page unfold?

Would you start at birth, showing your humble upbringing as you learned about your secret past?

Or perhaps you’d start the story in high school getting picked on by the bullies. Then one day you ate a genetically modified ear of corn and developed your super powers. Now you spend your evenings fighting crime as Maize Man (Or Maize Girl)…

 

Would the comic book be boring? Or exciting? Would your book become a collectors edition? Or pass out of print and into obscurity?

 

It might interest you to know, that nobody else has lived your life, and nobody ever will.

You are unique and you aught to be in comics. No one else can tell your story.

 

It’s possible that you’ve never been addicted to crack cocaine and overcome it.

You may never have been kidnapped by the mafia and lived to tell the tale.

It’s possible that you haven’t battled for your life surrounded by enemy soldiers and overcome the odds.

But maybe you have.

 

Or maybe your story is more important.

Maybe your story is the one that will inspire a single individual to look at the world a different way and realize they have value. Maybe in telling your story you can change the world for just a single individual. And for that dramatic change isn’t it worth putting yourself out there?

 

The neat thing is that it’s really not your responsibility to judge what your story can do, it’s your job to tell it. Because nobody else can.

 

And it is also possible that your story, in the telling, will change you.

 

One thing that I’ve always been amazed by is the impact of pain and guilt on the human mind. It is segregating and isolating and makes us feel alone. We lead ourselves to the assumption that we are alone. That nobody else would ever make the same mistakes that we have, or be flawed enough to fall into the same pits that we have.

 

Telling your story can open the world up. Because you will find out that you are not alone. And the people that hear your story will also learn that they are not alone.

 

Just look around at the world and you will find groups of people bound together over the most obscure things you can imagine. And the common thread that brought them together, is that somebody talked. Somebody was bold enough to step out and say “I do this, and enjoy it”, or in some cases “I am this way, and would like help”.

 

So a challenge for you, or perhaps you can look at it as an opportunity, is to find your medium. Where should your story be told? Do you want to talk to one individual at a time? Or perhaps a graphic novel is in your future. Maybe you should tell your life through interpretive dance? Don’t be limited by the medium, find a format that allows you to reach out and make the effort to connect. It’s your story, tell it.

 

So when you feel alone and isolated and not sure who would understand, remember that there are millions out there feeling the same way and it’s all part of the process.

 

Now if I could just figure out how to activate my superpowers. (Maybe some more GMO tofu?)

 

Namaste,

 

Kevin

woman peeking out vector drawing, stripped pattern red backgrou

The Spiritual Center of The World

Location World Icon

A friend of mine wrote a beautiful post about the reasons behind her move from San Francisco. In it she brought up several interesting points about community and spirituality. You can read the original post here.

 

The first idea that piqued my interest was the concept of the spiritual center of the world. It’s not uncommon to think of the eastern world and even to narrow it down as India being the spiritual center of the world. People often travel to India on spiritual quests for enlightenment, seeking the great mystics and guides that will aid on their path. What I found new to me was that the spiritual center of the world has shifted. Here is a quote from her post:

Not too long ago, I read an article by a travel writer from San Francisco who was told by several people on a trip to India that he was lucky to live in the “spiritual center of the earth.” This idea surprised him, as San Francisco is often described as quite secular, but as he asked around, he was told repeatedly that yes, for hundreds of years the spiritual center of the world was India, but now it’s San Francisco. The “spiritual center of the earth” was defined by a teacher as “the place where new ideas meet the least resistance.”

This last comment completely resonates with me, the spiritual center of the earth is the place where new ideas meet the least resistance.

 

In my mind dogma is enemy of spirituality. The moment you try to nail down higher spiritual concepts such as God or Spirit is the moment the mystery and awe begins to die. It becomes weakened because you have lost sight of the thing and are holding onto a metaphor that pales in comparison.

 

I believe this is why it outlawed in times passed to speak the name of God, familiarity leads to a sense of knowing that leads to presumption. Awe and Mystery require openness to new ideas and new interpretations of what we know, or more specifically what we thought we knew.

 

My friend also produced this little nugget.

I long, as does every human being, to be at home wherever I find myself.”

I love this thought.

 

As I was walking through the thoughts in my head tying these ideas together I realized I too seek to be at home wherever I am. And part of my quest, to be at home, is to not get tied down with dogma and weakened metaphors, but instead to be open to new ideas and new interpretations. For me to be the place where new ideas meet the least resistance.

 

It was then, that I realized, that the spiritual center of the world has shifted once again.

I am the spiritual center of the world.

And so are you.

 

Namaste,

 

Kevin

 

Embrace Your Life

seniors walking in autumn forest / hugging

I have a standard loop for my dog walk in the mornings. There is a detour I can take through a cemetery. It’s the same distance, but it’s much more peaceful with the nice trees and I get away from all the cars on the roads. It’s peaceful there, as it should be.

 

Today, I came across a man I had seen before. He bikes over with a small bundle of flowers to a corner gravestone. He moves slowly on the bike and off, his aging joints supporting his strong frame, but he is not as young as he once was. He places the flowers down by the gravestone in a small vase, and then stands there with his hands clasped in front of him as he begins to talk. He’ll talk for a few minutes to the gravestone. I didn’t listen in, I didn’t want to be rude. From his demeanor and appearance, I can guess he’s updating someone about his day and his life and just talking through things.

 

It reminded me, in all the chaos and hectic frenzy that life throws at us, we sometimes forget that we are living. We forget how brief and beautiful this world is around us. We forget how precious and rare are the moments we share with those around us. And how, all too soon, we could be that old man with the flowers telling someone how much we miss them.

 

Life is a gift and our experience here is ours, no one else’s.

Don’t be robbed of your passion.

Don’t settle for someone else’s dream.

Don’t worry about what the future holds.

 

You are here now, embrace it and embrace those around you that you love.

 

Namaste,

Kevin

 

seniors walking in autumn forest / hugging

Selfishness

I Love Me

I came across a quote this morning that I can’t pass on sharing.

Selfishness is not living your life as you wish. It is asking others to live their lives as you wish. -Oscar Wilde

Wow! I really like this thought because it redirects the voice in my head that cautions me to not spend too much time on self development. The voice that grew from others telling me to not be self involved and spending time focused on your self… because it’s selfish.

 

In retrospect, and with the wisdom of this statement from Oscar Wilde, I can identify that the person giving me their “wisdom” was in fact being selfish. They were saying, “I disagree with your priorities, you should use my priorities instead.”

 

It’s taken me years to be okay with self development not being a form of narcissism. I remember asking in a yoga philosophy class, “Why are we spending all this time on self development and introspection when the world needs our help? Shouldn’t we be helping the world.” The answer I got was another powerful awareness shift for me. So powerful that I still remember vividly, 8 years later, as if I was sitting in from of the teacher asking again:

When seek to help the world, but we ourselves are a mess, we make the world a mess.

When we seek to be at peace and balance within ourselves, that radiates out to the world and helps the world approach peace and balance.

 

We must live our lives as we wish an seek balance in ourselves or we will only spread imbalance.

 

Go inside today. Seek peace. It’s not selfish, it is part of the great work we strive to accomplish in this life.

 

Namaste,

Kevin

 

I Love Me

What Would Ego Do?

Control Emotions.

It’s all part of the package, being human that is, to interpret everything around us through our ego. The ego is a major portion of our physical experience here in the world. Anytime something changes, someone says something or a bird flaps it’s wings in the air, our first thought is typically “How does this affect me?”

 

It’s basic primitive thinking at our very core. I know this because when I’m tired and all of my built up responses are too tired to respond, it is still there, ready to fight for my best interests. When my intellect is indisposed and my gentleman is exhaused and my civility has already gone to bed for the night, my ego is always ready to jump in and take charge.

 

Don’t get me wrong. Ego is awesome. Ego is crucial. Ego is probably the reason we’ve survived on the planet as long as we have. It’s crucial to our functioning as individuals and an important component of our being.

 

The problem is, my ego is a bit of an ass. He’s self serving, completely obsessed with me and totally over the top when it comes to what is prudent and necessary.  To make matters worse, my ego doesn’t know when to quit. And when I’m tired or feel backed into a corner the ego is the part of me that stands up and represents. But there is more to me than just ego.

 

It is also important, when interacting with others, to realize that everyone has one. Every other person that triggers my ego is probably coming a place near their own ego that they may not be aware of. In many ways we are all operating in little bubbles of ego and all seems fine and good until our ego starts to run into someone else. Sparks fly and feathers get ruffled, as our egos battle it out, each having the goal of defending it’s perceived territory and best interests.

 

Then there are the more enlightened times, when I’m not as tired and my higher brain function is still firing. It’s these moments when I have more control over my mouth and can exercise reason over my ego. My ego is still there doing it’s job. But I can identify that my ego is not all of me, I am more than just a 3 million year old defense mechanism. It’s these higher patterns that bring out the good in humanity. It’s seeing that there is more to life than survival. It’s remembering that it’s not all about me.

 

The next time you feel yourself hunkering down for a fight getting ready to defend your turf, ask yourself, “What would ego do?” If you find that your actions are aligned with your ego, you may want to consider another path.

 

Namaste,

 

Kevin

 

Control Emotions.

Falling Down When Looking Up

Scared Chihuahua Puppy

It happens all the time, I hear someone talking about their path and I identify with them. I see we are on the same road, this is wonderful!

And then the comparisons start. I see how far ahead of me they are and my self judgement lights up.

“You aren’t a vegan like he is.”

“You don’t understand the world like she does.”

“You’re not happy all the time like he is.”

This list goes on and on. My voice of self judgement is quite creative.

 

In many ways the presence of services like Facebook make this even more prevalent. I don’t even have to leave my home to run into someone that appears to be doing more with their life. I just run an app on my phone and see people further down paths I wish to travel.

 

It makes me sad and it make me jealous. But worse than all that, it makes me feel lesser, like I am somehow inferior.

 

Logically it’s silly. There is no superiority to a person that leaves the house at 6am for a jog instead of a person that leaves the house at 6:15. And when you’re out for your run there is no point getting frustrated when you see someone ahead of you on the trail. Maybe they left before you and maybe they are a faster runner than you, but they are not you. You are performing your task in a perfect and appropriate manner for the only person that the task is relevant to, you.

 

But there is still that voice. And so it has come to my awareness at several points in my life, that the very people that inspire me, the very people I both admire and emulate, are the people that sometimes bring me down. Perhaps I trip because I spend too much time looking up. And perhaps I look up because I think they are higher than me. When in reality, they are just like me. They live, the struggle, they persevere, and sometimes they give up. The angle of observation that leads to my stumbling is solely a function of the height of the imaginary pedestal that I have raised them up on.

 

We are equals and companions. We are all in this together.

 

Sometimes the reverse happens. Sometimes I find someone that I perceive myself to be ahead of, and the little voice goes off in my head again.

“How could he not know it works this way?”

“She hasn’t figured this out yet? Oh myyyy!”

“Why does he still struggle with this? I have moved on from it.”

It makes me feel good and it make me righteous. But worse than all that, it makes me feel better, like I am somehow superior.

In many ways this causes me more guilt and dismay, when my inner voice talks down to others. It’s funny in a way that I’m more comfortable defaming myself than others. When my inner voice says I’m not worthy, I tend to give it credibility. But when my inner voice defames others I tend to chastise it or at least debate.

Maybe that means I’m half enlightened. Is that a thing? Can you get halfway to a quantum leap?

 

In truth I don’t really think being enlightened has to do with your ability to strike up a defense with your inner voice. And I don’t think the inner voice goes away. But I do think that the volume nob gets turned waaaay down when you realize the truth of things, that it’s words are only a reflection of insecurities and conflicts raised by false perceptions that trace back to moments beyond memory.

We are equals and companions. We are all in this together.

 

So I put all this together simply to say, it happens. To make you aware that the voices are natural and normal. And that the act of raising yourself up through them or falling down as a result of them is typical of the human condition… But it doesn’t have to be. Our minds are primed for comparisons. Comparisons are valuable and powerful and insightful. But the next step must be approached with caution. The transformation of comparison to conclusion is a mighty leap. Be aware of the conclusions you draw.

 

It can be challenging to simply stop drawing conclusions. Conclusions are in our nature. But when aware we can filter conclusions to try to determine what weighed into them. If you are drawing an emotional conclusion or if somehow your conclusions are based on ego, then it’s likely a false derivative of the truth.

 

Seek the conclusions that elevate all, harm none and guide us to the truth.

 

Namaste,

 

Kevin

Scared Chihuahua Puppy

Battling Belief

Sticky Believe In Yourself

Beliefs are tricky little beasts. The longer we hold a belief the more foundational that belief becomes. The more foundational a belief is, the more we have to lose if that belief is proven wrong. The more we have to lose, the more emotional we get when defending the belief and less rational.

 

This is one of my favorite stories from Emo Phillips:

I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off.

So I ran over and said “Stop! don’t do it!”

“Why shouldn’t I?” he said.

I said, “Well, there’s so much to live for!”

He said, “Like what?”

I said, “Well…are you religious or atheist?”

He said, “Religious.”

I said, “Me too! Are you christian or buddhist?”

He said, “Christian.”

I said, “Me too! Are you catholic or protestant?”

He said, “Protestant.”

I said, “Me too! Are you episcopalian or baptist?”

He said, “Baptist!”

I said,”Wow! Me too! Are you baptist church of god or baptist church of the lord?”

He said, “Baptist church of god!”

I said, “Me too! Are you original baptist church of god, or are you reformed baptist church of god?”

He said,”Reformed Baptist church of god!”

I said, “Me too! Are you reformed baptist church of god, reformation of 1879, or reformed baptist church of god, reformation of 1915?”

He said, “Reformed baptist church of god, reformation of 1915!”

I said, “Die, heretic scum”, and pushed him off.

 

Belief is powerful. Belief is divisive. Belief is fundamental.

 

If we are not guarded from the power of our beliefs we can allow them to control us, instead of guiding us. Beliefs need to serve as a foundation for knowledge. But they also need to be adaptable.

 

Beliefs are a tool of salvation and a weapon of mass destruction

 

There will come a time, and you may have already had this happen, when you find someone that you love, believes everything that you do… except for one thing. It may even be a conflict on the one thing that you hold most dear. And at that moment you have to decide will you continue to embrace and love them? Or will you push them off the bridge? (metaphorically)

 

I want to be clear here. I’m not talking about the old saying “Love the sinner and hate the sin.” I’m not suggesting that you are the person to judge another. If you fall into a belief system that involves the concept of ‘sin’, then that belief system dictates that it is God’s job to judge and not yours. So cut it out (said with love).

 

What I am suggesting is more radical and introspective, the person that must be reviewed and held up to a higher standard in these situations is you. I’m also not suggesting that you must change your beliefs based on those around you, this exercise is about awareness and acceptance. Perhaps the exercise will result in a change belief, or perhaps you will come to the conclusion that there is more than one way to believe on the subject.

 

The longer we have held a belief the more we tend to revere that belief. Revere/Take For granted. And beliefs that contradict are regarded as heresy.  Heresy is a powerful word. It doesn’t bring to mind level headed behavior. When you consider the response of a person to another that they regard as a heretic, that response is not rational. The response to a heretic is emotional, and powerful emotion at that. Rage, Fear, Distain, all emotions brought to mind by the very uttering of the word heretic.

 

So I encourage you to believe. Belief make us strong, it gives us purpose, it enables us to live fulfilled lives. But practice mindfulness within your framework of beliefs. Consider, are your beliefs making you a better person? Are your beliefs making the world a better place? Lastly, what emotions do your beliefs engender in you and those around you?

 

If you find yourself surrounded by heretics are you being the change in the world that you wish to see? Or are you part of the problem?

 

Namaste,

 

Kevin

Sticky Believe In Yourself