The word agnostic comes from the Greek language and means “Without Knowledge”.

Specifically, when the term is applied to spirituality it is defined to mean: “A person who believes that nothing is known or can be known of the existence or nature of God or of anything beyond material phenomena.”

I’ve been meaning to learn the Greek for “knows too much”. I often feel that I’ve lost sight of the wonder of the world around me. It’s very obvious when I interact with my 3-year-old. She sees wonder in the most mundane objects. The other day she was completely mesmerized by the bandage on my finger, she had to have one of her own! It was simply the best thing ever.

In many areas my knowledge has become a liability. Knowing too much has caused me to think I understand all, I have lost sight of the wonder that is all around.

When you are learning about a topic, there is a point where you are at the right level of information to understand the object and start to use it. If you continue to dig beyond that level, you may learn more, but the value of the topic may become overwhelmed by your knowledge of the topic.

There is a point where you have the appropriate level of knowledge and digging deeper is not beneficial.

Here is an example. If you were to look at a simple tool like a spoon, you could quickly ascertain the purpose and utility of the device. You can use the spoon to eat, or shovel dirt, or do whatever you feel like. This is an appropriate, or at least practical, level of knowledge. You understand the tool and can understand it’s purpose with the information you have.

Maybe you find that you really like spoons and you start taking spooning classes. You get all sorts of new ideas about what else you can do with a spoon. Transport water, pry open lids on  jars, etc. You are learning about the utility of a tool.

Imagine, that at some point in the future, you have learned all the potential uses of the spoon and you still think it is the most wonderful invention ever. So you try to dig deeper. You start to learn about where spoons come from and spoon making. You break the spoon down to a list of materials. You may now be delving into a realm that will break the mystery. The deeper you go, the more you begin to own it. The more you began to own it, the less you wonder at it.

Often we get so wrapped up in completely understanding things, or even just wrapped up in using a tool, that we lose sight of the wonder of if all.

It’s like losing sight of the forest because you’re so focused on the individual trees.

When it comes to God I am truly agnostic, or at least I attempt to be. I have been told a lot about God over the years. Interestingly, the further I dig into any given ‘truth’, that I have been told, the more those ideas fall apart. I find that I know nothing of God. The knowledge that I do have is really suspect and usually muddies my experience of the mystery of God.

I am in favor of further study of life and God and, well you name it. I love philosophy and I want to know more. But I have also found that the more I know, sometimes leads to, lessening of experience. There is a powerful value in knowing where to stop.

There is a time to stop, accept and appreciate certain things in life without digging so deeper. If you’re not careful you can get buried in the atomic structure and miss the bigger mystery.

If we approach life with the idea that we know nothing, we are much more likely to experience life itself instead of our own idea of the thing.

Take a few moments after you read this and think about a place where you know too much. Then take a few steps back, from your massive accumulation of knowledge, and look from the trees out to the forest. See if you can recapture the wonder that pulled you into learning in the first place.

Namaste,

Kevin

We are all laboring under the false impression that we are single minded. That we have a single driving force motivating us, thinking for us (with us?), watching out for us.

In truth we are a collective of minds with different goals and rules.

The old mind, is the seat of impulsive reaction and addiction. The place of animal instinct and gut feelings. It is often referred to as the Reptile Brain. This part of our mind can respond immediately to threats or temptations.

When we experience good things, winning a game of chance or catching the eye of a potential mate, dopamine is released into the brain causing the experience of pleasure. The resulting desire for more pleasure can lead to addictive behaviors.

Similarly, negative occurrences lead the old brain to try to avoid situations. The reptile brain recognizes when a bad situation is approaching and seeks to help us scurry away, to avoid recurrence of the bad thing. Always seeking pleasure and avoiding pain. This mind often has a mind of it’s own and we find ourselves subconsciously guided by it. When we do become consciously aware of its actions our attempt to override its desires can turn into a negotiation. This can be seen as an effort of will when the logical mind attempts to out maneuver the reptile through negotiation or subterfuge.

There is also the autonomic mind. The autonomic mind could be argued to be part of the old mind. This part of the mind keeps things running without you needing to think about it, automatically as it were. While you are reading this, the autonomic system is keeping your heart beating, your lungs breathing, your stomach digesting. This mind can run everything from the immune system to your digestive tract. It knows what needs to be done and does it. It is often difficult to even override the autonomic mind and decide to do something manually.

It is difficult to alter what the autonomic mind is doing. But it has a relatively easy time altering what you do. When your heart starts to fail, you don’t just get to override, it gets the attention of all your minds. When these automatic systems do interfere, it is usually in a big way. Suddenly nothing else gets done, while you work out how to resolve the problem with these systems, that we normally take for granted.

The new mind is the seat of logic and reason. It also encompasses pattern recognition and memory of things past. The new mind is the creator of ideas. Higher level emotions and reasoning come from the new mind. A combination of ideas from the past and imagination of what our future will hold, these are the constructs of the new mind.

Creativity is a benefit of the new mind, the ability to adapt and improvise. Coming up with a novel solution to a problem is where the new mind shines. This is where we most often analyze problems and think through moral issues and debates.

The observer mind could be argued to be simply a part of the ‘new mind’. However, when witnessing as the observer, it feels like a separate mind entirely. When in meditation, or simply practicing awareness, this observer is able to observe what is occurring in each of the aforementioned minds.

You can witness the transactions of the logical mind.

You can observe the reptile instincts as they jump into a defensive stance.

You can observe the autonomic mind as your breath flows stealthily in and out.

Our motivations, actions and influences aren’t always obvious. We frequently are not single minded. It can be very helpful, to take time each day, to learn to observe and note the subtle interplay of yourself with your self.

Remember to be graceful with your judgment and interplay as you observe your self.

When you just can’t seem to calm your monkey mind down, cut yourself some slack. Remember you have got a lot on your minds. Learn to relax and watch the show.

Namaste,

Kevin

What are you looking forward to?

At the time I’m writing this I am eagerly awaiting the registration time for the Google Developer conference. Registration opens at 7am sharp and tends to close at 7:00:05am

I got in 2 years ago when the tickets sold out in 5 minutes. Last year I missed as the tickets sold in less than a minute.

It’s a good conference. But there is a chance that I won’t enjoy the conference nearly as much as the challenge of getting a ticket.

By the time I publish this article I will either be profoundly elated that I was one of the chosen few, a statistical anomaly resulting from my effort, the speed of my internet connection and a roll of dice (metaphorically speaking). The joy and excitement is palpable.

One of the reasons that I’m able to enjoy this moment so much is that I have let go of the outcome. I am looking forward to the delight of getting a ticket while at the same time accepting that I am part of a large group of people excited about something where only a few will succeed.

Now I’m 30 minutes into the process of trying to get a ticket. Excitement waning.

There are many things in life like this. The excitement and anticipation far outweigh the actual experience. So it would seem to really benefit us to embrace the joy of the build up. Accept the excitement and potential of the upcoming moment without worrying about the outcome. Allow for joy in the face of uncertainty. And most of all remember it’s all part of elaborate game that we call life.

Namaste,

Kevin

P.S. – Still no ticket. 30 minutes of trying later. Attempts keep timing out.