I always thought I would get with it one day.

Have an exercise regiment, get in shape.

Find the answers to life, the universe and everything.

Find my passion and drive it through to it’s natural conclusion. (happiness and wealth, right?!?)

I would figure it all out and have it all. (At least the all that really mattered. And I would understand why it mattered and why the stuff I didn’t have and didn’t need didn’t matter.)

You know, I would become enlightened.

I thought I would reach some sort of state of perfection. And I sort of did.

I had a great exercise regiment. I was really enjoying the exercise.

I got so strong that I did a century ride around lake Tahoe…

And then I had kids.

I got so enlightened that I took a yoga teacher training course…

And then I had bills to pay.

I established a nice balance between work life and home life…

And then I got lyme disease.

Feel free to insert your own ideas here. The formula is pretty simple.

I <insert awesome thing here>…

And then I <insert derailing event/activity/acquisition here>

These aren’t excuses. They’re not explanations. They’re my life. And my life has had its successes and its failures. I’ve had my triumphant achievements and my cataclysmic events.

Like all things that happen to us, each event is a mixed bag. You can look at them as negatives or positives depending on your outlook in life. I don’t regret having kids for a moment. But to say it’s all sunshine and roses is delusional at best. To say it’s all manure and storm clouds is equally delusional. But to say these activities derailed my previous activities and reset my mental image of who and what I am is completely apt. To say that these events were life changing and forced a shuffling of my priorities is accurate. To say that in the shuffle I lost a few things that were important to me is also true.

So where do we go from here?

You’ve just been smacked down by life. What’s the next step?

Try again.

I always figured that once I had an epiphany and saw the light it would remain in view. I didn’t consider the fact that someone or something would jump up into my view and block my visibility of the afformentioned light. I didn’t consider that my epiphany would fade or need to be adjusted for the new world that formed around me. I never considered that I would have to have the same epiphany again.

It’s happened enough in the last few years that I have decided there needs to be a word for it. So when an epiphany comes back to you that you had forgotten over time, it shall now be referred to as a repiphany.

I also have to admit that I was initially ashamed of the idea. Or at least hesitant to mention that I needed to relearn something so vital to my world view. The idea that I would need to be slapped in the forehead by the same idea over and over again implies that I’m a little slow.

However once I came to terms with the idea that I may be a little slow, I warmed up to the concept.

The universe is patient and kind. It doesn’t mind repeating itself. It will send a lesson as often as it is needed and repeat that lesson whenever you need a refresher.

Embrace the repiphany.

Open to the idea that there is room in your life for a reset button. Maybe you’re not in the shape you were a few years back. Maybe your health isn’t where it was before that thing happened to you that made everything take a turn for the worse. Maybe you aren’t the same person you were when you realized that you needed to become a yoga instructor. But you still have room for growth.

Lucky for you, you’re already perfect. So you’ve got that going for you. All you need now is to remember to not be afraid. Be open to repeat experiences. Be open to hearing the same story from the past and learning the same lesson and reapplying the conclusions that were lost over time.

Open yourself to repiphany.

Namaste,

Kevin

It’s not an easy balancing act, living in this world. It’s been called the information age. I’ve also heard it called the disinformation age. We have everything at our fingertips when it comes to information, data, input. It’s all out there, and then some… It’s the “and then some” that gets us.

There is a lot of good going on in the world.

There is a lot of bad going on in the world.

The way I handle good and bad is quite different.

For some reason, with the good, I let it go. Maybe it’s poorly chosen modesty. Maybe it’s an over optimistic view of how the world should be. But when the good comes in, I smile, I am glad for it’s existence, and then I let it go. I allow the good to flow through me and let go of the feeling. It’s almost as if I expect the world to be that way so I don’t find myself surprised when I see it.

For the bad, I respond quite different. When I receive bad news, I internalize it. First I check to see if it’s my fault. If I can’t be blamed I breath a quick sigh of relief and then try to find the guilty party. Who is to blame for this evil in the world? How could they? Don’t they know they’re hurting people? Or when it’s really personal, “Don’t they know they are threatening me?” My injustice, ire and belligerence kicks in and I want it solved/fixed/removed. More importantly I don’t let go. I hold it in and hold it in.

Then to make matters worse, as I try to resolve the problem, I research the problem. I focus on the problem. I look for the culprit, trying to find the root cause and look for the resolution. I take more and more of it in.

For some problems this works… Or at least it used to feel like it worked, for the little problems. But as I’ve gotten older and the scope of my problems has expended. Or perhaps my attention has been diverted to larger problems. And the scope of my information available has expanded. I am able to take in more problems than I can hold. They come in, wave after wave, assaulting my mind. Wearing down my spirit. Filling me to capacity, and then adding just a little bit more.

There is an old saying, “that’s the straw that broke the camels back.” It means the camel had just enough weight that it could handle it with some strain and then you added just a bit more, just one more straw. I’ve never tried it, but I assume with this analogy the camel ends up a cripple and can no longer carry any loads, let alone the load it was capable of hauling just before the final straw was added.

For me, it’s the bursting point. I take in all the bad, hoping to find a resolution. And suddenly, POP!

There is so much going wrong in the world.

There is so much going right in the world.

It’s okay to want to fix it. It’s okay to look for a way to make world better.

It’s not okay to let it destroy you in the process.

My work, my great task, is to approach the action of letting the bad flow through me.

Ignorance isn’t the answer. I can’t ignore it. But I don’t have to hold onto it all. I simply can’t.

As Pollyanna says, “If you look for the bad in people, you are sure to find it.”

I can’t solve the worlds problems myself. I am not the designated judge of the worlds actions.

I just need to live my life as I hope others will and be the model of an ideal world within myself.

As I say on my email signature “Kevin is a work in progress… Which is pretty cool.”

Namaste,

Kevin

I had an interesting topic all picked out for today. An analogy designed to get your mental gears running and snap you out of your daily grind. But as I sat down to write, I realize, I’m completely stressed out. My breathing is shallow. My thoughts are racing. I’m probably having a small scale panic attack. I say small scale, because I’m still able to intellectualize and ponder what to write, I’m still writing to you now… But thoughts race through me like scared rabbits looking for a bush to hide behind. Nothing sticks. Everything and everyone in my mental menagerie is trying to run for cover and wait out the storm.

I can’t change the storm. There is a lot going on. Most of the goings on are my perception of changes coming. Change terrifies me. I usually like change, after the fact, but only after. After I can look back and see the good in it. But I’m in the uncertain period of the actual change. Right now I don’t know what the change will bring.

With every silver lining you will find a cloud attached.

So today, I’ll simply ask you to breath with me.

Stop, Sit, Ground.

Find a safe quite place.

If you can, step outside and take off your shoes and socks. Place your feed on the dirt or in the grass.

A quick warning here. A couple weeks back I was in the need for grounding. So I took the afternoon off and went to a park about 30 minutes away, right by the Sacramento river. It was a beautiful day and there was a wide grassy field between me and the river bank. The open grass field was spotted with the occasional tree. Each tree had decided it was time to grow more of themselves, so they had dropped tiny seed pods all over the field. Mostly invisible to the naked eye, but quite visible to the naked foot. I felt like I was walking on thorns to get to the rivers edge. Word to the wise, choose your grounding path strategically.

Where was I? Ah yes, connecting with the earth.

Find seat, or ground standing, at your discretion.

Take a moment to close your eyes and listen. What do you hear?

I am fortunate to be away from a busy road and my ambient noise is the chattering of birds calling out to each other. But I’m not uniquely able to enter this practice. It’s not about being in a peaceful place, thought that doesn’t hurt. It is about being aware of your place. Perhaps you are near a busy street with cars going by. Perhaps you are on a busy sidewalk with people bustling by. Be aware of the stimulus. Acknowledge it. Now release it.

Deep Breath in, breathing in for 10 seconds. Fill your lungs completely, as if your body hasn’t had oxygen in weeks. Hold the air in your lungs for 3 seconds. Let your body savor the air. Then release exhaling long for 10 seconds. Then experience the void, holding an empty lung for 3 seconds.

Repeat until you realize you no longer need to repeat it. Take these steps until your body has reset it’s rhythm. Your body will begin to naturally take in more air.

You may find that as you settle into a quieter place the stress reaction attempt to speed things up again… This is okay. Take a breath and start over.

So often the subtle mind leads the body. Your body is experiencing a stress reaction because your mind is convinced you are in peril… You are not. Your wisdom knows this. You know you will be okay. You are transitioning. You are becoming the breath leading the body. You are becoming the tail wagging the dog.

Now, With your eyes fully open, look around you. Take in all that the scene in your world has to offer. Acknowledge it, pass it through, don’t judge it. You may be looking at a dirty house. You may be seeing graffiti on a mailbox. Maybe you’re in a park with a waterfall. Try to lose the mental words you would use to describe it, pretty, ugly, broken, new, instead simply witness it. Be the observer.

Back to your breath. 10 seconds in, hold for 3. 10 seconds out, hold for 3. Repeat.

Next tap into your skin. Maybe it’s cold. Maybe you feel the sun. Perhaps there is a breeze blowing across the hairs on your arm. Observe, try not to judge. Just be there.

Back to your breath.

Tap into your smell now. Are there any odors here? Close your eyes and take them in. Perhaps one smell jumps out, perhaps the blend becomes a neutral smell that has no impact at all. Acknowledge and move on.

Back to your breath.

Lastly, if the location works with this option, see if you can tie in your taste. Maybe there is a mint plant nearby and you can grab a piece of mint to taste. Maybe it’s lunch time and you can grab a sandwich. Or, if you’re really lucky, you decided to experience this practice near somewhere with ice cream. Find your taste, experience it, try not to judge. Be with it.

Back to your breath.

I don’t know about you, but I’m feeling better already.

Namaste,

Kevin

I grew up with a “nose to the grindstone” mentality. Hard work will get you where you need to be.

Just keep working at it and you will succeed. And while hard work is crucial, critical, required, it’s not for everyone.

Or more specifically maybe I should say it’s not for everything and everytime.

There is a time and place for keeping your head down and working hard. And there are rewards for your efforts.

But I’ve also learned over time that when you just put your head down and work hard, it’s easy to miss that you’re trying to plow through a wall that already has a path built around it.

The world needs visionaries. The world needs ideas. The world needs a shift in prospective.

This all came to mind because I saw a report this week about a new product, transparent aluminum. It’s an amazing new ceramic that can be made thinner than hardened glass and be 10 times as strong. My mind immediately flashed back to a formative experience in my youth, when I went to see Star Trek IV. If you haven’t seen the movie yet, you should really go watch it, it’s one of the best Trek stories EVER! Without too many spoilers, they travel back in time and need to construct a giant storage tank with clear walls. So they work with a local industrialist to obtain the clear walls. As they have no money they barter by giving the man a secret from the future, a chemical formula that will enable him to make transparent aluminum. Fast forward to 30 years later and we’ve done it! All the details and connections can be seen here. It’s a real substance now. It can be made incredible light and incredibly strong. And it all started with someone’s idea.

Back in the 1980’s someone had a vision for transparent aluminum. It worked it’s way into the cultural mind through exposure in a movie and 30 years later we have something very similar.

It can be a long road from the vision to the future. But without the vision the future won’t happen. If someone hadn’t had the idea and shared it we wouldn’t be able to benefit from the implementation in the future.

Our world is created from our past visions.

Some of these visions have become a little scary. We need new visions and new direction. We can’t just expect the world to suddenly be better. We need to imagine it better. Dream it better. Share a vision of better. Then let the collective team of our world put their noses to the grindstone and make it happen.

A vision can come in moments. Implementation can take 30 years. But without the vision there is no implementation.

If you look at a ratio of percentages, you could say that the implementation is the most important part. It takes 99.999 percent of the time. The vision only takes 0.001 percent of the time. But without the vision there is no action. Without the vision, there is nothing.

Go be a dreamer. Write down some ideas. Share them. Today is not the day to make it happen, today is the day to imagine what will happen. Put your nose to the grindstone tomorrow.

Namaste,

Kevin