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Tag Archives: personal growth


I was sitting at a red light this morning. Stuck behind a car going straight that was blocking me from getting to my turn lane. The left turn light turned green, one car went, and I couldn’t move. The light turned yellow, and I couldn’t gun it to get through the intersection, I was blocked. The light turned red. And then the car in front me moved forward through it’s green light and I could finally get into the turn lane, stop, and wait for my turn. I was frustrated, I had missed my green light… Or had I?

It’s easy to get confused on our path in life about timing. We get excited about things that may happen, or things that should happen. But if things don’t happen, you can usually find there was a good reason. Sometimes that reason is simply that it wasn’t your time. I saw the light turn green and I wanted to go through, but it really wasn’t my turn, it was the other cars turn and I was getting ahead of myself.

There are once in a lifetime opportunities. When these come along we should make every effort to seize them. But most moments, the moments that we tend live each day in, are cyclical moments. These are moments that will come and go, and then come again.

It can be hard to recognize it, if we’re too wrapped up in our own experience, but it’s a privilege that we get to watch these moments unfold for others around us. Like the traffic light, it can be frustrating when you see someone else having their moment and you thought it was supposed to be yours.

Frank just got recognized by your boss in a big meeting for his good work on the last project. You worked on that project.

Sally just won a free car payment from her bank. You’re paying for a car too.

Alan just fell in love. You want to be loved.

But, these are not your moments, these are their moments.

Your time will come.

Like a traffic light, inĀ  your life there are times when you have the green light, and there are times when you have the red light. Remember when a light turns red for you, that means it is green for someone. Except for at that stupid timed intersections where there are no cars going the other way and you just have to sit and wait. Those are just annoying. But that’s a metaphor for another time.

There are times when you see the light turn green and you’re still far away from the light. By the time you get to the light it’s turned red again. You can get frustrated with this, or you can remember, it was not your green light. It was not your time. But your time will come.

Today relax and embrace the cycles. If you see a moment come and go, reflect on the truth that it may not have been your moment at all. But if it was, and you missed it, relax in the knowledge that if you need it in your life, it will come back. You are whole, complete and cared for. Your time is going to come.







I remember reading a powerful short story in college, A Tree, A Rock A Cloud. I do not recall the name of the author. The story described a man that was trying to learn to love again. He had been hurt and was trying to start over. He found it very difficult to love and as a result was taking baby steps. He started by learning to love small things and moving up the chain. Naturally, based on the title he started with a tree, a rock, a cloud. Over time moving up to a crowd, and his ultimate goal was to be able to love a woman again.

As I’ve learned more about life and love over the years, I’ve begun to think he missed a step. I believe he should have started with himself. Once you love yourself and accept that you have worth and value, you can truly love others. Once you have practiced compassion and love for yourself then you will understand what is needed to practice compassion and love for others.

I think that love, when pushed outward, without first loving and accepting yourself, often does more harm that good. It sends a confusing message to the recipient. Tainted love, as it were, comes from a source that says “I will give you something that I am am unable to accept myself.”

Once you have learned to love yourself you can then radiate compassion and love that is a comfort to others. There is a natural and smooth progression that will then be easy to share with a tree, a rock, a cloud, a crowd and an individual. It can be freely accepted and transmitted without baggage to those around us.

Learning to love yourself is one or our life’s challenges and one of life’s great gifts. There are many practices that can help, but at the forefront are acceptance and compassion. Allow for the truth that you are worthy, valuable (priceless really) and a blessing to the universe. Practice endowing yourself with love and that love will radiate from you like the warmth of a star.





On average, the average human being is not average.

There is really no such thing as an average person. We are all legendary, and we are all boring. We have moments of extraordinary exhibition. We have moments we would rather forget we were involved in. Even someone living an average life, has room and opportunity to excel and thrive.

When it comes to the path we have chosen in life, we often use that to define ourselves by labels. “I’m an Engineer”, or, “I’m a Pastor”, or, “I’m a receptionist”. You are not a label, you are the whole package. You are, “All that and a bag of chips” as colloquialism clarifies.

We in turn hear labels coming from other people and mentally pigeonhole, assuming that the label sum up the person. But these are only indications, glimpses of the fullness that comprises each of us.

The full definition of your person comes from and is defined by countless decisions you make each day as you walk your path. It is easy enough to see the path that lay ahead of you. Or to imagine the path that lay ahead of and behind another soul. However, there is a difference between knowing the path and walking the path.

Do not judge your neighbor until you have walked a mile in his shoes.

The challenge doesn’t lay in knowing the path, but in walking the path.

The truth about your life is, that there is more to you than meets the eye. You have depth and capabilities on standby for the occasion when they are needed. Walk your path with grace and compassion, for yourself and others.

Go do something extraordinary with your life.