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“It’s complicated”. This phrase has been leaving my mouth a lot recently. It doesn’t seem to matter if I’m talking about how to interact with my 4 year old or the state of global politics. I consider all the things that are going on around me and when I try to explain them, or put them into words, all I can come up with is “It’s complicated”. Which I suppose is a way of throwing up my hands in the air and saying “Hell if I know”… But it’s a little more polite in conversation.

It’s a clear sign of being overwhelmed. Inundated. Past my threshold.

I miss being 20 something. Even then I had a lot going on and a lot of doubts about things. But the world seemed a lot simpler. My problems seemed a lot more… Well I was going to say easy. But in reality, I look back at them and they appear easier. Many appear trivial. But they look easy, because they are past. I know I survived them, or overcame them. I know it’s going to be okay, because it was okay. Everything turned out, more or less, for the best.

I feel like living in the world today takes more than it did back then. But that may be a fallacy. My world has changed dramatically since I was in my 20’s. I have kids and a wife. I have many more bills to pay and responsibilities. It’s hard to look objectively and state that the world today is different because of X or Y, when in reality the world is different because of everything.

Is the world today better or worse? Are people devolving or evolving?

It seems the more I learn about how the world ticks, the less I accept as being understood.

My world view has evolved.

My reasons for doing things have changed.

I am still me, and I am still optimistic. But I have adapted, I have changed. I am not the same as I was when I set out on this journey. Which, to be fair, I believe is the reason for the journey.

What I’m trying to say is, “It’s complicated”. But it’s going to be okay.

Namaste and Love,


No, you can’t always get what you want.

But if you try some times,

you just might find,

you get what you need.


Who do you want to be today?

Who do you want to be?

Who do you want to be today?

Do you want to be just like someone on TV?

Just like somebody on TV.


Sweet dreams are made of these.

Who am I to disagree?

I traveled the world and the seven seas,

Everybody’s looking for something.


Some days are dry

Some days are leaky

Some days come clean

Other days are squeaky

Some days just drop in on us

Some days are better than others


I’ve found a new friend, underneath my pillow.


She’s a maniac, maniac, at your door.

And she’s dancing like she’s never danced before.


Enid we never really knew each other anyway.

Enid we always saw right through each other anyway.

It took me a year to admit it was over

And it took me two more to get over the loss



Where are you going?

To see a crazy old man.

What will he tell you?

He’ll tell me where I am going.

What will you do then?

I might just quit my job.

What will you do then?

I’m going to find my way home again

home again

home again






Rolling Stones – You can’t always get what you want

Oingo Boingo – Who Do You Want To Be Today?

Eurhythmics – Sweet dreams

U2 – Some days are better than others

They Might Be Giants – Fingertips

Hall and Oats – She’s a maniac

Barenaked Ladies – Enid

Danny Elfman – Home Again



I yearn for nothing.

I seek nothing.

I desire nothing.


My mind is everything, everywhere, every-need.

My mind spins and loops and jump and wiggles and wobbles.


I need nothing.

I need the peace that comes from silence.

I need the moment that comes between the moments.

I need nothing.


Yet I continue doing everything.

I continue working down the nub.


I am worn.

I am spent.

I am good for nothing.


Yet I avoid nothing.

I am afraid of nothing.


I feel like I must do everything.

I must try something.


What can be accomplished with nothing?



What can be accomplished with everything?



If I do nothing to get to nothing.

I am left with nothing.


If I do everything to get to nothing.

I am left with nothing, but I am also spent.


Nothing is inevitable.

Yet I fight nothing.

Nothing will save me.

Nothing can be lost.

Nothing will come from nothing.




There is a reason they say choice is easy.

Choosing is easy, almost subconscious. Often we find we’ve already made the choice. We spend the rest of our time trying to legitimize our bias, or to rationalize our choice. But the choice is easy.

The challenge is when it comes to actually ‘doing’ the thing we’ve chosen.

The work is hard.

It is useful to understand why we made the choice. This can help with motivation. It can be very useful to remind yourself that your life is complicated and messy by choice. You are not a victim. You have chosen the path you are on today. Why are you here?

The choice was easy. The path is hard.

You are doing the difficult work of living.

Remember why.

Live today.



I was reading a book to my kids on sales and marketing. The kids were suitably intrigued and found the story engaging and fun, while they may have also picked up a few details on the topic. The most interesting part to me, was my reaction. I felt uncomfortable talking about sales and marketing with my children.

I have always been uncomfortable with sales and marketing. Trying to understand why and how to get over/through this issues for my own business is the focus of much self work that I engage in.

Even presently, as I am struggling to grow my own businesses, I find myself hesitant. My activities are critically intertwined with sales and marketing. Though I feel somewhat more noble taking advantage of the fruits of other peoples marketing efforts, rather than engaging in my own. I suppose it’s akin to hiring an assassin instead of killing someone yourself… The fact that my brain comes up with this analogy is a clear indicator that I see marketing as dirty and unseemly, analogous to killing.

The book was sharing the idea of a kid’s lemonade stand. A simple enough idea. It discusses how, when you run a business, you need to consider the expense. You have to pay for inventory such as lemons, sugar and cups. You need to advertise, in this case a simple form of poster boards put up around your stand to point people in the right direction.

This to me is a good and pure activity and has simple math and business lessons for us all.

The book goes on to talk about various forms of advertising and how they can be used to reach people (TV, radio, print, etc). This is where things start to get uncomfortable, techniques for making the customer ‘need’ your product. They discuss packaging, making the items look more fun and engaging. How some packaging is deceptive, such as making the product look bigger or nicer than it actually is. Also, the discussion moves towards making people feel like they need something. Advertisements focused on making people feel, if they have the product, they will be more beautiful, have friends, etc.

In many ways I wish I had someone introduce me to these ideas when I was younger. But I still don’t know how much it would help. Advertisers have honed their art to such a degree, it’s almost like black magic. Crafting the words and ideas in such a way that the claims make you feel like you need their product to fulfill your desires. “If I just crack open an ice cold soda I will be surrounded by friends and dancing teddy bears.” We know it’s not true, but the image is in our heads and the association is there. Soda advertisements never show obese people sitting alone in a dark room watching TV and eating a tub of cheezy puffaroos while they check their insulin levels.

I think this is part of my concern. My version of a soda commercial and theirs exaggerate certain aspects of life. They are focusing on the positive and desired aspects of life that they want associated with their product. My advertisement of their soda focuses on the negative. It’s a snapshot. Not the full picture.

When I sell someone something I want them to be aware of both sides of the coin.

Warning: My blog may contain boring prose where I ramble about ideas that you don’t care about and have no impact on your life.

I suppose some level of it is ego management. Lowering expectations so I don’t disappoint. But there is also a large group of people that would have no interest in my blog whatsoever. I don’t need to focus on those people, they won’t be reading the blog.

Others can point out my flaws.

Others can also point out my merits.

So on balance, this leads to my current approach to marketing, which is to let the end results speak for themselves. The merit of the content and materials will ‘sell themselves’. To a degree this is true and to a degree this works. But… If you are going to speak about yourself, your work, your products, why would you bad mouth them? Why would you become your own voice of dissent? Why turn your own market against you?

You are your own marketing group. Whether it comes to dating, selling, being part of a community, everything you do. You don’t have to be false. You don’t have to manufacture a need for your product. Believe in your value and the merits of your products and speak highly of them. If you truly don’t believe in the product you are selling, then you need to change the product or find a way to believe in yourself. Self sabotage doesn’t protect you from failure, it ensures it.

Go out there and succeed. I’ll see you at the top of the mountain.

Love and Namaste,


Why do we rush so?

Why do we busy ourselves with so much nonsense?

There is the standard answer that helps me move on and ignore the question: I need to make a living. I need to feed myself and my family. I do what I do to survive.

I was listened to the radio yesterday when ‘Dust in the wind’ by Kansas came on. I’ve mentioned the song here before. This time it struck me powerfully in a moment of busyness. As I listened I almost began to weep.

I was reminded that all my busy work and activity will not be remembered.

It occurred to me as I considered my busyness and rushing about, that it has little to no impact on the world at large. Thought of legacy doesn’t typically enter my day or impact my choices. My light and my shadow are fleeting and then all too soon gone.

“Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more: it is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.” – Macbeth – Shakespeare

Don’t despair. This is your moment on the stage. Enjoy the stage lights. Anticipate the applause. Appreciate that you are the player and that you are only here for a brief run.

Enjoy the show.

My point, if I am force to make one, is that we take ourselves very seriously. In a few moments we will be gone. Nothing but dust. Perhaps our time would be better spent watching the clouds make shapes, then trying to reshape the clouds.

“Mongo only pawn in game of life.” – Mongo – Blazing Saddles – Mel Brooks

Namaste, Kevin



Wow! It has been a long break. I have not posted a blog update in just over a year. I was looking at my website today and realized 2 interesting things. I’ve been thinking about writing a blog update for the last few weeks. So here is the long awaited return of my chakra thoughts.

1) My last update was on 5/5/16 Just over 1 year ago.
2) The title of the update was ‘I Don’t Need You Right Now’

I intended for the title to be a means of letting you, my loyal readers, off the hook. A way of letting you know that you don’t have to be on all the time. That we can relax a bit. So we all took a year off. I have been learning a bit about manifesting through thought and energy over the last year. Well, the initial exposure was a long time before that. But the last year has been an exercise in faith and practice. I have to say, there are aspects of it that are going very well, and aspects that are completely unexpected.

I had no idea when I wrote that post last year that I would then not write again for a year. But I put the thought out there, I expressed the energy, that I didn’t need you, and then it manifested. And might I add, I’ve kind of missed you all. For many of you the energy is intangible, I have never even heard from 90 percent of my readers, but I would like to. Please send me an email, reply to my post, say hello. I would love to hear from the people the universe has seen fit to connect me with.

Additionally I have to say, with no hint of modesty, for all of us to take a year off was a colossal mistake. The world apparently, desperately needed us, in our absence they have made some very bad decisions. But we stepped away from the helm and look where we are now…

So I say with love in my heart and compassion in my thoughts, let’s get back out there. The world really needs us. Like, REALLY REALLY needs us! So let’s get ready. I guess I need you again too. Welcome back.


Go take a 5 minute break, you’re not needed right now.

There is a lot going on in the world, there always has been, there always will be. You are not responsible for managing it all.
I was out for lunch at a local pizza place. I was by myself and it was pretty much just me and my thoughts. Well there were a few other people eating in the restaurant. Oh, and there were TVs playing random shows placed around the walls. I think I counted 10 TVs each with a slightly different sports event playing. There was also music playing over the sound system in the pizza place. So there I was, practically in a zen sanctuary, on my precious lunch break, trying to relax. I set my phone down on the table and just went into my head for a few minutes. It was more or less quiet in my head, apart from parsing the music and random snippets of conversation and visual input of the silent TVs. At that moment it occurred to me, “Someone might need me, I should check my phone!”

It’s been a rough week. I got a speeding ticket on Monday. My daughter got bit by a stray cat Wednesday. Lots of concerns and built up anxiety about the future and the present all pile up to a feeling that something must be done right now. I must be needed by someone, somewhere, right now. So I have taken some time off by myself today, to step away from all the needs, in an attempt to have some time where I feel I am not needed. So I surround myself with devices that foster constant need.

I’ve yet to determine if my phone is high maintenance, or if it is me that is high maintenance. But we certainly interact with each other frequently in a high touch manner.

Also, was I high maintenance before the phone? Did I need to know this much about the people around me before I could? Now that I can remain in virtual constant contact it makes it hard to distinguish between when that contact is actually needed, and when it is just convenient.

I remember back before mobile phones were ubiquitous and ‘smart’. I recall a time when I was responsible for after hour outages at my software job. A pager was handed off to me at the end of the workday on Monday, I was told to keep it on me for the week, in case there was a problem. How I balked at the idea.

“My personal time is mine, I need the separation between my job and my life.” I yelled at my boss, quietly in my head, as I took the pager and placed it in my things to go home with.

I look back and think what a luxury it was to even be able to suggest such an idea. How amazing it was to be able to say “You won’t be able to reach me this evening, I’ll be out.” This was almost 20 years ago. It’s probably been 10 years since that level of disconnect was even possible from the world around us.

Don’t get me wrong. I know that it is possible to live your life less connected. I know there is a path to a life not always tapped in, but it’s not the mainstream path. I have friends that have a home phone and nothing more. I both marvel at this in wonder, and imagine what it would be like to go back to that. But it’s definitely the exception and not the norm any more.

So today, the average person in the US, is pretty much accessible 24/7. We put ourselves out there as being reachable and in touch. There was a time, almost forgotten now, when being out of touch was the standard. When having periods of un-reach-ability was expected. There was a time when having something called downtime was considered common.

Even now, as I sit here writing this, I pause and reach toward my pocket wanting to check my email. Wanting to see if anyone needs me. Wondering if anything wonderful, or more often terrible, has happened that I should know about.

If you are reading this and wondering, I want you to know that I don’t need you right now. The rest of the world can pretty much keep spinning without you for a bit also. Please go as far away as you can, and rest. Your time will come, you will be needed, but it’s not right now. Take a breath and regroup. We all need you to be well rested for when you’re actually needed. Right now all is well.


Cute Little Girl Playing Grand Piano In Music School

Why don’t we have recitals any more as adults?

My 6 year old just had her first recital. It’s seen as a growth moment, a rite of passage and the culmination of learning something new. But it’s also just a milestone. She sang a song and played the piano. While she did wonderfully, it doesn’t mean she is done. It does mark a fantastic milestone, with many more to come.

So why don’t adults have recitals? There are so many things we learn as adults. So many actions that we are practicing, doing for the first time. Could we have a parenting recital? Or a job interview recital? Or even a standard recital? Go learn to sing. Learn piano. Take up a new craft and show it off.

There is no point in finally being an adult if you don’t get to keep learning. And now you have the freedom to learn whatever you want. Nobody is telling you to go practice your piano. Nobody is telling you to read up on basket weaving. It’s all down to you.

I would like to formally invite you to try something new. Practice, practice, practice. And then go show it off. Have your own recital, or better yet form a recital group. A team of people bonded together with nothing more than the quest to learn and a forum to show it off.

Go have a recital!




Consciousness is enigmatic at best. It’s easy enough to explain it in self referencing terms, for example, “I think, therefore I am.” But it’s difficult to abstract away from the subject itself to describe what consciousness actually is. I wanted to introduce you to the concept of the record needle.

Dj Stylus On Vinyl Record

Imagine for a moment that your life is a record. You are born on the outer edge of the record and you die when the last song plays on the inner edge near the record label. Your whole life is represented by the music across the vinyl.

So what are you?

Are you the record? Yes. But this represents you across all time that you will occupy and have occupied.

Are you the music coming out of the speakers? Yes. But this is really the side effect of your presence.

Are you the record player? Yes, arguably, along with the rest of the universe. You can be seen as both part of the choir and the conductor. Player and played.

But what of your consciousness? Where would this metaphor put your consciousness? The answer is, the record needle.

Dj Needle Stylus On Spinning Record

Your consciousness is actually a tool, or mechanism, through which you are married to the present moment. Your consciousness enables you to experience your life one moment at a time. Without the needle the record would be a collage of random notes and orchestration. You need a linear experience to be able to process and attempt to understand the content.

Spinning Vinyl Record. Motion Blur Image. Vintage Toned.

Without life being presented as a momentary experience, everything would happen at once. There would be a tremendous burst of sight and sound, light and darkness, noise and silence, in an instant and then nothing.

Perhaps that is truly what the big bang is/was/will be. Everything happened all at once. Within that a tool was devised to allow souls to try to understand/experience that flash. How would you try to break down, literally everything, into digestible chunks?

How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.

Thus comes consciousness, a needle on the record of your life. Allowing you to process this experience linearly.